Luckily for you, Alice and Martha have not, to use the common phrase, done a bunk this week, though they might have to if all the Slytherin listeners start coming for them! Harry tracks down the Gray Lady, who really might want to consider taking out a restraining order on “The Baron,” and finds his… Read more
It’s too bad Flight of the Prince has already been taken, because that really would have been a much better title for this chapter–well, or, The Carrows Come to Call. While Ron and Hermione rush off to find a “bathroom,” Harry acts on Dumbledore’s orders and tries to tract down the missing diadem (which, in… Read more
Neville’s back, and he’s a changed man, from his newfound confidence to his shrunken arm. At the same time, gossip king Terry Boot can barely contain his excitement, Michael Corner considers opening a bar (though the name is still undecided) and Cho Chang, Harry’s ex-girlfriend, is as tempting as ever. All of this chaos does… Read more
In the process of persuading the GOAT of his commitment to the mission, Harry ends up convincing himself, and proceeds with his nice job, which is the sort of thing you’d expect an unqualified wizard kid to be able to do without overstretching themselves. Meanwhile, Ron stuffs himself with cheese and mead, though he definitely… Read more
Heh! $%&*#!! Three highly edible humans take a joyride on the back of a dragon – in case you hadn’t noticed, they just broke out of Gringotts. They’re covered in burns, but it’s nothing a little dittany and pumpkin juice can’t fix. At least they’re not wearing the cup around their necks, that would look… Read more
The trio flies by the seats of their pants to make good on a premise laid out in book one, banking on one evil hair to disguise Hermione (and her voice) perfectly. Griphook keeps a tight grip on ol’ Hook, Travers finds an amazing hiding spot in the Gringotts caverns, stalagmite’s got an “M” in… Read more
Harry concocts a despicable plan to double-cross Griphook, though it’s not nearly as vile as breaking into Dumbledore’s tomb – he could never have done that. Fleur–who is not an owl–escapes from ze Grindylows long enough to give Aunt Muriel back her tirahrah, which is easier done than said! And finally, Remus John Lupin arrives… Read more
It’s back to the book club as Alice and Martha dive into “The Wandmaker,” alternatively named “The Banker.” Harry makes his decision in the Horcruxes vs. Hallows debate, and he is incredibly confident and assured in the wake of Dobby’s funeral. Actually, he’s highly logical, which allows him to look past extraneous detail. Meanwhile, You-Know-Who… Read more
Numerous plots converge in what is definitely (SPOILER ALERT!) the best chapter of the book so far. Luna, Ollivander, Dean, Aberforth, Draco, Bellatrix, Griphook, Greyback, Grindelwald, and Wormtail all play important roles in the action, but none as important as our fallen warrior, Dobby, a free elf, who knows no master! From new character impressions,… Read more
Watch Harry descend into madness as he contemplates the Elder Wand… the Resurrection Stone… the Cloak of Invisibility! Hermione is most skeptical, but old Xeno was right- she is limited. Narrow. Close-minded. Ron provides the trio with some much-needed stability and optimism, not to mention some amazing password-guessing skills. And finally, it’s time for some… Read more
